Oh Hi. I'm Kelsey and I haven't blogged in a LONG time.

Well its been like 7 months since my last post.  To say the least, a lot has happened.

But I no longer have the time or energy to catch up in detail so here is the quick run down.

We had Christmas at Trey's mom's house! It was really fun. We stay for about 5 days. It was so fun to watch Kohen open his presents. He was a little tired because he went to bed really late and then Trey (being 5 years old) woke everyone up at 7 haha.  Always a kid at heart.

We had my cousin Greg and his wife Natalie over for New Years Eve for dinner and then our friends Derek and Libby came later.  We were all tired by 11 haha.

Maddix Oliver was born on March 18, 2014.  The delivery was certainly not how I wanted it to go.  My water broke at 6 am and I didn't start contracting on my own.  So around 11 they put me on pitocin. Now, I really wanted to try and have an all natural delivery because I didn't want to be on pitocin.  So there went my plan.  But I tried to avoid and epidural and that didn't happen.  I still wasn't having hard contraction by 3 in the afternoon so they had me on the biggest dose of pit they could give me and then the pain hit.  Holy. Crap. Now, I know a lot of people have different opinions and experiences of birth.  Blah blah blah, I'm convinced that pit makes it so much more painful AND my I had no amniotic fluid so they were dry contractions and that crap hurt.  I might be just a big fat wimp but I lasted like 2 hours and got an epidural.  Best decision ever.  I'm not even wasting time next time.  I really wish I could've done it naturally but I swear the universe was against me and trying to convince me that epidurals are like medicine from heaven. It worked.  Maddix was born at 6:44 pm and the delivery was amazing.  There's no other way to describe it, it was just something I'll never forget.  He came out weighing 7 lbs 7 oz and 20 inches long.  He looked identical to Kohen! Then by the next day he looked completely different.  He is very mellow and easy going.  He is so happy just like his big brother!  He coos and laughs now (2 months old) and at his 2 mo appointment he was 12.12 and 24 inches long. He has little chunky thighs and the cutest smile.  Kohen has been so good with him.  He wakes up every morning asking about "baby" and gives him kisses.  He has only tried to injure him like 4 times, which is a lot less than I thought he would.  Nothing explains the feelings I have for my babies.  They are the greatest blessings.  They bring me so much joy and at the same time test my patience to the point of tears sometimes!  Motherhood is hard! And I swear it just gets harder.  For example, going to the store with one kid used to be a nightmare.  Now its a dream! Two kids is insane!!!!  I don't even want to think about more! But there are those moments through the day where I can't even believe how much I love them.

Kohen is 2! We had a huge party for him and Trey since their bdays are two days apart.  It was the day before Maddix's blessing and boy did we have a lot of people come and support us.  It was overwhelming seeing how many people love us and were happy to come celebrate with us.  We are so so blessed.  We were supposed to have the party at a park but of course that was the one day it rained like it hasn't in a long time so we crammed about 40 people into our basement apartment. It was a "mustache bash" theme.  So much fun.  I just can't believe Koko is 2! Well, I take that back... I CAN believe it because we have hit the terrible twos and its a new adventure for sure.  He can speak in almost full sentences, but then he will revert back to point and something and saying "ehhh."  Goofball.  He loves airplanes! He loves cars, bikes, books, watching movies, and he LOVES to play outside.  He has quite a few little friends in our ward, most of them are girls.  Actually all of them are girls but one.  So he has played princess dress up a few times haha! He really loves to take baths and asks me a few times a day to take a bath.  He is a tricky eater, some days he eats as much as I do and others it takes an hour to convince him to eat his lunch.  He is so much fun and really so sweet and happy.  He likes to go to nursery on Sunday and all the moms tell me that he helps the younger kids find toys and he shows them around.  My heart swells when I hear that.  And then he smacks me in the face and brings me back to reality haha!  When he gets tired he has these crazy violent outbursts and hit and pinches your face.  It is really hard to know what to do to discipline him because he doesn't respond to time out and he doesn't listen when I yell.  I'm telling you, motherhood is hard! But so wonderful.  I sound crazy don't I? All you moms get it though.

 A crazy happening: we went to Vernal this past weekend so Trey could help get a store ready for opening and Kohen was sick.  Well it turned into really bad croup and we had to take him to the ER where they have him breathing treatments and steroids and then had to be monitored over night! Poor kid!  He is doing much better and we are happy that is over with!

Trey is still working working working.  He is over 7 stores right now, but will soon lose two because they are training a new area manager so that will lighten his load a little.  He is over the new store in Vernal and will have to drive out there (3 hours away) once a week and stay over night.  So that will be fun... They do have a town home out there for him to stay in and I can go with him sometimes.  It will be nice to go out there more because a lot of my family on my mom's side and some old friends live out there so I will get to see them more often.  Trey loves his job and does such a great job at it!  We have seriously been so blessed with his job.  He is gone a lot but it will be worth it in the long run.  He is also serving in the Young Men's presidency at church AND is the ward mission leader.  When I say he is gone a lot I'm not exaggerating!! Needless to say I'm excited for next week because Jordyn is graduating on Wednesday and then we are going to Hawaii on Friday for 7 days! I'm so excited.

This time of year is really hard.  Saturday will be the two-year anniversary of my mom's passing.  I miss her still everyday and think of her all the time.  Before I lost her I really didn't understand that losing a loved one doesn't really every get easier.  There are always new sad thoughts, like the other day I realized I will never know my mom when I am older.  She will never be at birthday parties or go on vacations with us.  I still long to call her everyday.  I wish I could tell her about the huge blowout Maddix had when we were at the Zoo and how Kohen freaked out yesterday at the store and scratched the top of Maddix's head.  I wish I could tell her how great of an example she is to me and how now that I am a mom myself I realize just HOW AMAZING of a mom she was.  I wish I didn't take her for granted so much.  I wish I could just hug her and tell her thanks for all she did for me.  In some ways it is weird that it has already been two years... but honestly it feel SO much longer.  I know without a doubt that I will see her again, its just so hard that it is so far away.  People often tell me how like her I am, and although that really is the greatest compliment I could have receive, I am so far from being like her.  If I could be half the person she was I would be happy.  I miss her SO MUCH.

Sometimes life is really hard and crappy.  Sometimes I want to just hide in a closet and cry.  Sometimes I get really angry that things have happened and that my life isn't perfect.  But HOW GRATEFUL I am for the trials I go through because they bring me closer to God and they make me a stronger person.  I feel like a very weak person a lot of the time, but I'm so thankful I can pray to Heavenly Father and He can comfort me and give me strength when I need it.  I'm grateful for the people He put in my life to help me through difficult days.  I am thankful for my amazing husband who is so patient with me and who I don't deserve most days.  He is really my best friend and rock and I love him more every day!  I'm so grateful for my Nanny who lets me call her and vent to her over dumb things and who always makes my day brighter.  She is one of my biggest blessings.  I'm thankful for my family, even though we aren't perfect and we struggle a lot, I'm thankful for them, for my dad and siblings and all they do for me.  Family is the most important thing to me.  Value your relationships and nurture them because you never know when you could lose one.  I need to take my own advice a lot of the time.  But really, life is short and we need to love more.


Here are pictures from Maddix's blessing day :)

Now enjoy some adorable pics of my adorable boys